Archives for posts with tag: Stockholm

Continuing on the Invincible Viking theme: “dumb” they are not, in any way. Swedes are highly intelligent communicators, and they’re willing to risk their lives to exercise their right to use their mobile devices.

Nurse Angry’s keen eye has observed that Stockholmers of all ages, shapes and sizes are pretty much incapable of doing anything without a smartphone in one hand, either fiddling with it or, just as likely, yakking away. Here are the 10 most popular activities no longer possible for an urban Swede to perform without a phone:

10. Walking a dog or just walking on the street (with or without human company)

9. Driving a car

8. Riding a bike

7. Pushing a baby carriage

6. Eating in a restaurant

5. If you’re 8 or older, going to school without an iPhone 6 is a major faux pas in the Swedish capital

4. Hanging out at the playground with the kid(s)

3. Paying at a store

2. Using the bathroom (there’s a fair chance of finding an abandoned phone in pretty much any bathroom, public or private – it seems that 2 hands may be needed to rip off toilet paper or button up pants. Nurse Angry humbly leaves this to your imagination.)

1. (Nurse Angry’s personal favorite) These brave new superhumans are now fully capable of navigating, steering and braking  bicycles of all types with one hand while holding a phone to their ear with the other. Even with a toddler on board. Or when pregnant. Or over 85 years of age.

No headsets necessary for these badass uberpeople!

FYI: if you are biking behind someone who’s riding slowly and swerving around like they’ve swigged down most of a bottle of aquavit, not to worry: they’re just writing a text.

Nurse Angry has so far not seen anyone using their phone at a workout class. Well, just once she saw a woman manically texting during spinning. But in Nurse Angry’s humble opinion it was a pretty boring class, and technically it counts as riding a bike, even if it’s not moving and you’re being blasted with EDM.

What will the Swedes do for their next trick?

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Nurse Angry has recently started working with an ear-nose-throat specialist. Tragically, this does not give her immunity to afflictions in said area. Ahhh, laryngitis! Nurse Angry wishes she could take a magic pill, but a virus is a virus so she’ll have to make do with fluids, voice rest and cough sedatives. virus1Awww, isn’t he cute!

Nurse Angry does not know how it is in the rest of the world, but in Sweden we convinced ourselves that the horrific, no-sun summer of 2012 was the cause of the epidemic of viruses that plagued us fall-winter-spring. But summer this year was wonderful and now everyone is sick again. Small person in the household has already been sick 4 or 5 times since going back to preschool and the teenagers have fared only slightly better. Not to mention the myriad illnesses of Nurse Angry herself. Only the Old Guy stays pretty much healthy, wealthy and wise.

Flu attack! How a virus invades your body: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rpj0emEGShQ

 Here in Stockholm (affectionately known as The Capital of Scandinavia, see earlier blog) nobody seems to know how to wash their hands or to cough/sneeze into the crook of their arm. And personally Nurse Angry thinks it is a bad idea to go to work sick or send kids to preschool sick. We’ve all done it but maybe we should rethink that equation.

The Big Picture Book of Viruses!! http://www.virology.net/big_virology/BVHomePage.html

Once upon a time Nurse Angry saw a TV program about viruses. It was scary.  This was back in the early 80’s. And at the end they asked one of the researchers “Who will win the war between man and the viruses?” He answered without hesitation, and Nurse Angry’s readers are smart enough to know what the answer was that has haunted her ever since. But there is an upside: we probably don’t need to be so worried about global warming because the viruses are definitely going to get us first. So party on. And pass the Cocillana. Tastes so strange that Nurse Angry just has to wonder what even stranger taste is being masked.  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ethylmorphine

IMG_0248

Aside from the fact that it is a bad photo. Waaaaaaaaaaaaah!

Actually, there are probably quite a few things wrong with this picture, but seriously, what’s with that SIGN? The one that looks like it’s hanging by a thread.  On the filthy wall. On the building housing Fastighetskontoret- the offices in charge of real estate owned by the city. Nurse Angry is not kidding.

Take a closer look.IMG_0247

Note the nice little bit of raw concrete above the top of the sign- sign must’ve slid down a little, right? No. That is the way it’s supposed to be. Tilted.

Yes, that sign with the sickening slogan “Stockholm. The Capital of Scandinavia.” How uptight, smug and self-absorbed can a slogan be? Nurse Angry gets, well, ANGRY every time she bikes past it.
What was wrong with “Beauty on water”? It was at least true. Nurse Angry even prefers “The Venice of the North” and that’s a pretty appalling statement.

Luckily the perfect antidote is right around the corner. Nurse Angry recommends going immediately a  few hundred meters to your left to have a look at Stockholm City Hall instead. Ahhh, lovely. Thank you Ragnar Östberg!

http://international.stockholm.se/City-Hall/Pictures-of-the-City-Hall/

stockholms-stadshus